Broken

My wife's Tahoe is broken.  I am not a mechanic so I really have no idea what is broken.  I just know that we had to take it to a mechanic to get it fixed. 

While many of us feel inadequate to the task of fixing cars, trucks, and the like, fixing a broken vehicle is often a relatively simple thing to do.  You take it to a mechanic, they look for what is broken, they put in a new piece to replace the broken one, and after paying them what feels like an arm and a leg (and you have no idea if what they did or what it costs was reasonable) you drive away no longer broken.

Broken people and broken relationships are much harder to fix.  Sometimes, when I listen carefully, it seems as if everyone is broken in one way or another.  Other times, when I am pushed down within myself, it seems as if I am the only broken person to ever walk the face of the earth. 

The broken parts of me caused me to act in ways that broken my most valued and intimate relationship.  A year ago, Tammy and I began working to fix the brokenness of our marriage.  We have had to rely on the grace of God often to bind us up just so we could make it another day.  There is no quick fix, pay the man, and drive down the road answers to this level of bring broken.  And sometimes, even now, Tammy and I can feel the scares and pain of the deep broken place where we were.

I cannot fix my wife's car.  I need a mechanic to do that.  I cannot totally fix myself.  I need the grace of God to heal my brokenness.  Tammy and I cannot fix the broken parts of our marriage alone, we too need the mercy of God's Spirit to bind and heal us.  So today, I just ask for a little more grace and mercy to fix what is broken.

WHY?

"Why?" This is one of the hardest questions to answer. Think about talking to a two-year old who has just discovered this time-perplexing and mind-numbing question. They ask, "Why do I have a belly button?"
You say something cute like, "Because it is where God kissed you."
"Why?" comes back again.
"Because God loves you."
"Why?"
"Because God loves everybody."
"Why?" "Because God is love."
"Why?"
Well you get the picture.
Giving a close to scientifically correct answer, "You have a belly button because when you were growing in mommy's tummy before you were born, that is where you and mommy were connected." Well, you know the "Why?" is coming and there are details here that you are not really sure you want to explain to a two-year old.

Today, I am struggling with "Why?" I am not two-years old, but the question is haunting me. A 21-year old man died this weekend in a local swimming hole. He is a friend of a member of the congregation where I serve. They met working together for a company that hires adults with learning problems.

As a parent of a child with learning issues (my younger son has Down-Syndrome), I know the family has asked "Why?" many times over the course of 21 years. "Why is our child not like all the rest?" "Why does it have to be so hard?" And now the question for this family has changed to something even more profound, "Why is he gone?" "Why did he have to die?" "Why has God done this to us?"

To try and explain, "Why?" is useless. There is no good answer to this question. If we knew why, it might be more painful than we could endure. And knowing why does not take away the loss. But this does not remove the reality of God's all encompassing GRACE and LOVE. Yes, it still hurts, and yes the questions will still come in the night, "why . . . why . . . why . . . why?" And still God is there with us, holding us, keeping us, weeping with us and for us.

I have no answer to the "Why?" this morning. I can only look to my faith and to the mercy of Christ, who loves us in all things. Being a Christian, a follower of Christ, does not insulate us from the many hard things in life. It does remind us that the hard things are not the final answer. The story does not end with a child being born with learning disabilities. The story is not finished at the bottom of swimming hole. The final word is not death. As a follower of Christ, I know the final word is hope for all God's children, life abundant, resurrection is the face of death, future with no limitations.